Posted by: andyouinvitedmein on: July 8, 2009
Hasn’t the news been full of deaths lately? Some expected, some a shock, and most untimely. We just returned from a family reunion in Houston. It was great! We left with our souls over-flowing with love, both given and gotten. So how does this all weave together—other than the fact we were on our way to the family reunion when we heard about Michael Jackson?
People have a need for their family to ride out the bad times, but also be there to help restore lost souls. The Lord is the one who ultimately restores our souls, but He makes good use of our family in the process. When they’re there, who else do you need? What happens, then, to people without family (either blood or by religious bond)?
I heard Chuck Smith, Jr. once say that when a person isn’t allowed in church, or to come home it’s like a musical piece that abruptly stops without warning. Even the non-musical sorts can discern that something isn’t right. When we separate from our loved ones because of a matter we disagree with…whether it’s spiritual, personal, or because of an argument about dish washer detergent (it’s happened!)…it is a song that isn’t finished, and leaves all persons with a void.
Many conservative Christian communities embrace the concept of disfellowship. There’s scripture selected for this practice. I can remember 40 years ago I had a relative-in-law disfellowshipped from the church because he killed his wife…nothing was said about the wife’s many transgressions, or the fact the fatal bullet may not have come from his gun because it was like an Old West shootout; it was messy. However, I was 15 when this happened, and considered disfellowship a wrong practice for these reason:
We conservatives don’t have an exclusive club with a secret knock. We have a building of whosoevers who have joined because Jesus lives in their heart, OR they are seeking to find out more about Jesus. If we rip the final chord from the song, then we’re left without a song. If we don’t allow certain people in a church, then we’ve forced people to believe that God doesn’t love them. Their hearts are then broken and they may seek other things to heal that hurt, or to fill the void. When we don’t allow our family members to come home “until they repent,” then we shut a door.
We have been given a great salvation, and to whom much is given, much is required. Open the door and welcome in that lost child…extend grace….love beyond reason and God will change your heart!
Posted by: andyouinvitedmein on: June 21, 2009
Random thoughts from the week:
In the last week I’ve witnessed the hand of God move in a powerful way. While in DC I spent a great deal of time in prayer about several issues going on up there and over the next week God came through in an incredible fashion. For example my oldest daughter’s boyfriend’s rental was being foreclosed on. His roomie found places for everyone. Boyfriend’s place is a room in a large home. When Daughter and Boyfriend walked in they saw a man that she had been seeing at the Prayer Furnace. A place they go to that is similar to International House of Prayer. Boyfriend has been seeking a deeper walk and this is it.
When they headed off on their mission trip to Peru their flight was cancelled due to mechanical failure. Then their plane ended up being late and they missed the connecting flight from Dallas. And they were then sent to Los Angeles. LA to Peru and not Miami to Peru??? And it was at LAX where a friend was coming in that morning. Now mechanical failure prevented them from seeing this friend, but the moral of this story is that any sort of change in schedule is probably God-ordained. He will move planes around to get people together.
Twitter has overnight revolutionized a nation and the world. A friend of mine named Kathy wrote: “what if there had been Twitter in the Holocaust? Vietnam?” Exactly…and the cool thing is that people are twittering back ideas for the revolt. We have to remember what Martin Luther King, Jr said in his Letter From A Birmingham Jail: “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.” We have to help those whose voice have been taken from them, because one day you might need a voice.
My last thought for today is this…as you know I’m from the South and I’m a conservative. So many times were hear about someone being “worldly.” Worldly means television, internet, Facebook, or whatever. Long ago it was listening to the regular radio station rather than the Christian station. Today I wondered if “worldly thinking” with Jesus might not be so much secular radio or embracing equality, but maybe being in the world is more a heart thing: lust, envy, greed, pride, etc. Pastor A envies Pastor B’s church and that is worldly. Just a thought…
My summary of all these random thoughts: trust God is moving even when it seems like all is lost; speak out against injustice because you never know when it might happen and you need a hand; don’t judge by regional standards of what is God. God is moving and just because He is late doesn’t mean he isn’t working—he might have a plane to re-route on your behalf. Finally, remember Jesus came and died for us. He gave us grace when we didn’t and don’t deserve it. Go and do likewise!
Posted by: andyouinvitedmein on: June 12, 2009

Last week the girls and I vacationed in the Washington, DC area, and were able to get in a few hours at the Smithsonian. As an added bonus we got to see the new Night in the Museum movie at the Air and Space Museum. What a treat! However, this week the series of museums were in the news when a shooter went into the Holocaust Museum with a gun and killed a guard. It was his hatred and feeling of superiority that led him there.
As I’ve mentioned in earlier posts, I’m quite familiar with that type of attitude. In 1964, when I was ten, we moved into the heart of the KKK. In an effort to recruit my father (futile effort), he was made privy to physical acts of violence against African Americans in that year and place. The men who did this had hearts that were warped in a superiority-type of hatred for another group of people.
Amid all this with the shooter and the reminder of modern-day hate crimes, I’ve become increasingly concerned about the issues around legalism. This problem occurs when we believe we’re superior. We might not be shooters or even have an active “soap box,” but I challenge my fellow conservatives to step back and look at our actions….in a way that we make sure we’re never guilty of this aire of superiority.
One story that my oldest daughter told me was about a girl who had been active in church, then got a new boyfriend and eventually moved in with him. Now she isn’t permitted in church. What???? What’s this Body of Believers thinking? Is the church a social club for the “good people”–oh yes, good people, I guess that never sin.
Sin is more than just the outward and obvious. It is all about the heart. Remember the Pharisees…they did everything right according to the Law. However, Jesus wasn’t impressed with their pure actions, and said their hearts were sinful–just as sinful as those men in Fosters, AL in 1964. As conservatives we somehow tend to overlook the heart-based sins and instead point fingers at those who are in a “sin” that we can see with our eyes.
Therefore, my conservative friends, please examine your heart. When you judge by the length of a person’s hair, skirt, relationships, or the type of praise music and style of worshiping the Lord, etc. you are judging by externals. Turn and allow the Lord to move within you to more understanding, an act of grace, or examine your own heart for the personal issues you need to address.
You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. Gal. 5:13-15.
Posted by: andyouinvitedmein on: May 7, 2009
I think one of the bigger issues this week has been the bill having to do with punishment for people who commit hate crimes. I’ve gotten a couple of pieces of advice from both sides of the debate. I would like to weigh-in a bit on this for my more conservative pals.
If you’ve followed this blog for a while you know that when I was ten we moved from the “north” (Kentucky) to an area just south of Tuscaloosa, AL. I had lived my first years where the integration of schools was simply merging a school rather than a political drama. The drama began (after we moved) in 1964 when my fifth grade teacher asked me about going to school with black student…she actually used the n-word. She asked about “them” smelling and biting. I learned that “them” were hated by the locals. As well the locals believed that “them” could be treated in a sub-human way. Members of my father’s church bragged about the terrible deeds they did to “them”. Members of our church harassed my father for refusing to join their local whites-only club called the KKK.
So here we are 45 years later. I’m finding there is a new “them” out there. I’m a school counselor and one of “my” children told me it was okay to hit, stab or kill a person because they were gay. Certainly a nine-year-old doesn’t just go to bed at night and dream this up without a bit of help from a significant adult in their lives promoting this belief.
I’m not much for making comments on hot political issues, but let me throw this one out for you (my conservative pals) to chew on….
Almost eleven years ago we had the opportunity to speak out for someone who had been injured by a crime borne of hate. Matthew Sheppard was brutally killed and I don’t remember one significant conservative pastor opening their mouth to say “this is wrong!” Instead we were silent…I was silent. Maybe we just wanted to be “us” and if we spoke out against what happened someone might think we were “them.” No clue.
Instead, in our silence there was one “Christian” voice–an evil man who said he represented “us” because in his demonstrations of hate he held signs that stated he was a Christian, and was speaking for God. Because we chose to remain silent, he became the face of fundamentalism and in many peoples’ eyes they think he is one of us…
This bill was written to protect people from him. So when we worry about what the hate crimes bill will do to “us”–we need to first think about what happens when our acts of grace remain hidden. Next, take we need to take our ”grace” temperature. Are we servants who live like Jesus or do we have a political agenda to protect our rights? Grace isn’t a warm fuzzy…it is dying to self so others can see Jesus at work.
I’ve heard rumor will this take away the rights of pastors/Christians who want to point a finger at sin. The answer I have: a person giving grace won’t lose their rights. When we live like Jesus our “rights” aren’t so important. We will take a bullet for them because we refuse to let “them” be harmed. Jesus did it for us…
Posted by: andyouinvitedmein on: April 12, 2009
I am watching The Passion of the Christ with my family. I haven’t seen it in three or four years. As I flinch and tears well up, I cannot imagine someone going through that for me. The other day a few things went wrong in my life…someone has betrayed me in the workplace. Nothing huge, but enough to hurt my feelings. Then another someone someplace got their nose out of joint because of something they perceived I didn’t do. Then my car died with a huge price tag associated with the repair. And I’m a fallen solider.
What little something we get all upset over and Jesus took our sin even when we curse him, moan and groan and complain. When we murmur or get angry (stay angry)…he is right there because he died for our sins.
There is saving grace that comes from Jesus’ death on the cross. The grace that changes our eternity. Then there is common grace that is a daily occurence. Just remember that our daily acts of grace show people who we really are. Are we a hypocritical judge of others or are we doing what Jesus wanted us to do in Matthew 25:35, 36 — For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me
Posted by: andyouinvitedmein on: March 15, 2009
Supplies available to clients are those necessary items that can’t be purchased with food stamps.
There is something wonderful going on in Dallas. It is an AIDS Service Organization called White Rock Friends…an outreach of the White Rock Community Church and its mission is to support the HIV/AIDS community by offering a variety of programs to assist individuals in their day to day lives. It is more than just your bag of groceries and a pat on the back until next month…
I don’t know who began the program years ago, but right now Douglas Shaffer is the go-to man with all the facts. It was his vision to take this from government red-tape into a program that’s available to meet peoples’ needs. Clients become friends who come to the church facility on Tuesdays (for the store, only) and Saturdays to get their supplies like Pinesol, bandaids, and toilet paper. They can also get clothes and have a wonderful lunch. Daniel is the head chef of these lunches and he has only missed one Saturday in eight years. That’s dedication! Everyone there is dedicated.
Another thing that Douglas realizes is that many times our friends who are HIV+ or have AIDS need food for their pet. Pet food is in abundant supply at White Rock Friends (and so is Emma, the Maltese and mascot of White Rock).
The word in a nutshell for White Rock Friends is caring. Everyone who serves cares for the clients. The clients feel the love. For Valentine’s Day there was an elegant meal of chicken cordon bleu, green bean casserole, dressing, salad (with nice greens), fresh fruit salad, chocolate covered strawberries, cheesecake with caramel or strawberry sauce…and it was YUMMY! My family got the honor of serving food that day. We also got the honor of meeting many of the clients.
If you are ever in Dallas visit White Rock Community Church and find out how you can help this wonderful ministry.
Posted by: andyouinvitedmein on: December 25, 2008

Trans-Siberian Orchestra as photographed by Michael W. Tyler
On Sunday we went to see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra, and with all the lights and acoustics I suddenly felt like I could be on that stage performing. I was dreaming like when I was younger and it seemed like the sky was the limit on what I could do and who I could become. When you are young you don’t think about not seeing a loved one again.
The last twenty-four hours has been nostalgic in that I longed to be back at my grandparent’s house. There were certain things that could only happen there with them like my grandfather calling Santa “Santy”. Or my grandmother always burning the bottoms of cheap biscuits–those you buy in four pack for around a dollar for the four.
Everyone was welcomed at their home. Family members who might not be welcomed anywhere else were welcome to come and have a bite to eat and fellowship. Because my grandparents were peacemakers, no one who had an ought with another got mad at Jewell and Ercie for befriending the other party. This gift has been passed down to my parents as they could have hostile acquaintances come to their table and peace would take over everyone…there was no more family or friend “war”.
This is Christmas Day…the day our Savior was born and it was through him that our sins are forgiven and we are reconciled to God. Today is the day you need to find that loved one who has been outside the warmth of your embrace…if you can’t find them by traditional means search through Google, Facebook and MySpace. Make this a “Lost Sheep Day” and welcome them home.
I started this blog by talking about youth and things we don’t think of such as losing our loved ones. On Christmas Eve morning I lost a friend named Jack. He was a beloved pastor who had the heart of a child and embraced everyone. I’ve known Jack for eight years and suddenly time was gone: time to tell him how much I loved him or how much embodied the grace of Jesus in his everyday life.
On Christmas Eve night a close friend became a grandmother. That baby is just like the baby that comes to everyone. Remember that special love the first time you saw your child, sibling, friend? If you are not in touch…reach out and get in touch TODAY!!! Blessings…
Posted by: andyouinvitedmein on: November 10, 2008
I read in the newspaper about conservative churches being picketed by gay groups. I already knew that $73 million was spent on this election on the gay marriage issue. Thought: WWJD with that much money? That’s a lot of warm meals for hungry people poured down the proverbial toilet. We didn’t have that on the ballot in my state; however, if we did, and if the final tally went against my belief I know that when I got up the next day the sun would still come up and nothing would change because God is still in control. But some people forget that and forget about grace.
There are rumors of all kinds of change that might occur if the gay community got the right for same-sex marriage. One of those rumors is that “kindergarten children will be taught about same-sex marriage.” Answer: Kindergarten teachers don’t have time to teach what they have to teach, and certainly won’t take their time to teach about same-sex marriage. However, most teachers already speak to the hearts of their children and make them feel safe. These teachers will do whatever it takes to make their students feel “normal.” Last year a dear ultra-conservative Christian co-worker had a child with two moms, and she always treated those moms with dignity. So Mrs. K was teaching her students that she respected every parent as well as every child no matter what.
I would like to suggest that God’s heart breaks when we conservatives speak such harsh words about people who believe differently from us. I believe that God wonders how we can experience such grace for our lives and not turn around and hand it out to others.
And talk about the things we make up to try to win people to our side…did you ever hear “the one” about how all gay people want to corrupt our kids and make them gay? Sure you have if you attend a conservative church. Guess what…its a lie. Certainly that myth was in my mind the first time I let my daughter spend the night with a girl who was the daughter of a lesbian couple. But she came home and the only thing that she knew was that her mother (me) lived my faith.
I just want to leave you with this parting thought: 3 John 1:9-11 says: I wrote to the church, but Diotrephes, who loves to be first, will have nothing to do with us. So if I come, I will call attention to what he is doing, gossiping maliciously about us. Not satisfied with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers. He also stops those who want to do so and puts them out of the church. Dear friend, do not imitate what is evil but what is good. Anyone who does what is good is from God. Anyone who does what is evil has not seen God.
In this scripture I believe that God is warning us about gossiping in a manner that hurts people, refusing to welcome brothers, and putting people out of the church; God calls it evil. Therefore, use your words wisely, my dear conservative fellows. God loved us so much that Jesus died for us. For ALL of us.
And $73 million of walls have been built between the conservative community and the gay community. What would Jesus do? Simply read the Gospels and see what Jesus did each and every day.
Posted by: andyouinvitedmein on: September 6, 2008
Read a review of my book by American Library Association executive council member, Diane Chen. This is from her blog on the School Library Journal: http://www.schoollibraryjournal.com/blog/830000283/post/700031070.html
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